Global warming threatens to create climate change at a scale that will threaten human life on earth. Desertification is already beginning to decay social and politcal fabrics in sub-saharan Africa. Oil is reaching a breaking point, a point at which demand and supply will tip and the global energy infrastructure could collapse causing major electricity and gas shortages. Water supply is now at such a crisis point that millions are dying every year from diseases which have known and simple cures, but require clean water.
No need to worry. Ed Norton, whose vast experience in environmental sciences includes pretending to be a childhood icon named Smoochy the Rhino, has the answer.
Children of Africa, sleep well tonight. Ed Norton brings his own bag to the grocery store and when the Islamic militants who are circling your refugee camp while fighting a centuries long war find out, they will run away in fear and never return.
Celebrities, here's a tip on avoiding becoming a liberal douche bag. Stick to what you're good at. When it comes to saving the environment, there are a lot of other people in the world who are much better at it than you. Ed, for example, is much better singing off camera with his liberal douche bag friends.
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3 comments:
So what's worse, being a liberal douch bag spouting off about all kinds of things that you no nothing about, or the one who does nothing?
I'm not necessarily condoning the ad, it seems like a manager said, "hey Ed, you should have a cause to support. Here's your list:
• whales
• something with puppies
• no more bags at the grocery store
Which do you like?"
I think when you have that much money and others will listen to you, some feel an obligation to try anything so they don't feel empty.
Or you can suck my balls.
In the first paragraph, did I really use "no nothing" instead of "know nothing"?
Jackass.
I would say that trying to help by doing something that's far outside your area of knowledge can be potentially disasterous. Too often the poor or the undeveloped world is treated like a great photo op or an experiment. But loads of media attention don't always equate to loads of help. And sometimes, it can leave people feeling even more hopeless than before. I've seen it happen too many times in recent months.
However, I would still love to suck your balls.
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