Is this religious enthusiasm gone awry?

Some of the greatest weapons ever conceived:

He-Man's Sword of Power (By the power of Grayskull!) ...

Thor, God of Thunder, and his mighty hammer, Mjolnir...

Zeus' Thunderbolt...

Sauron's Ring...

a Jedi's lightsaber...



... and the Armor of God?



Please allow me to preface. I'm a Jesus fan. I'm a recovering Catholic who still believes in a Christian God (notice the capital "G") despite also believing that it happens to be the same god that Jews, Muslims, the Lakota and pretty much every other religion believes in. There IS a higher power in the universe, don't fuck with me on this.

I also have a strong belief in stories and legend as a method of teaching our youth. It creates positive connections with the past and, if performed correctly, teaches analysis and self-reflection. These are all traits desirable in healthy citizens.

I am also in favor of delivering a sense of security to your children as necessary...

... BUT COME ON!

Let's see if I can put these ridiculous garments in perspective:

• A boy playing the violin in elementary school...
• ... still less likely to get his ass kicked from here to the woodwinds than the kid caught wearing these PJ's.
• Wetting the bed at camp...
• ... still less embarrassing than wearing these.
  
• Feeling scared to participate in a "Woody Contest" at a 3rd grade birthday party...
• ... still less scary than the fires of hell licking the bottom of my feet "fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace." (Ephesians 6:15, NIV)
• Can you imagine filling a child with so much fear of hell that they need a SATIN SHIELD to protect themselves at night?

Another criticism I have, the creators, in my opinion, took the Ephesians text a bit too literally. From Ephesians Chapter 6:

• Verse 14: Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place,
• Verse 15: and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace
• Verse 16: In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith
• Verse 17: Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit

Hey lady, if you're going to make the costume, DO IT RIGHT. GIMME MY DAMNED (HA, pun) SWORD OF THE SPIRIT! I want to be able to smite my enemy, I can't do that with a shield, that just makes me a well-protected punching bag. Jesus' followers need to be able to take the offense every once in a while.

God bless the Singer Corporation (or Husqvarna), God bless internet marketing and God bless a lack of metaphorical interpretation.

PS -> Special thanks to a very special teacher.
a. It is capri weather.
b. I'm hot for teacher.